[ERKU] Inbox

[canceller]

"You've reached the inbox of Jeremiah Gottwald. I'm unavailable at the moment,
but leave a message and I'll return your call as soon as possible. Thank you."

TEXT - AUDIO - EMAIL - VIDEO

un: orange

Comments

[711]

It's not that. When I get close to you, I remember what I did and start shaking and feeling anxious. I didn't want to end up in tears and embarrass us both.

[Oh. They've gone from accidental dick pics to heavy conversation, who could've expected this?]

[canceller]

There's nothing embarrassing about that. You feel remorse, so you react.

[So strongly, though? Why does that make him worry? What is it that he still needs to hear?

Why would it ever just be about dick pics?]

You can't break me. You didn't then, so you won't now. I can't stop you from feeling how you do about it, but you don't need to be afraid of yourself. I'm not.

[711]

[It'd be hard to break a man with a metal ass, but this is Suzaku. Suzaku can break anything.]

You're a very kind man, Jeremiah.

[Kinder than I deserve goes unspoken. Suzaku does deserve kindness, doesn't he? He realizes that now. He's learned this now.]

Can I ask you something? It's about that time in the hangar.

[canceller]

[He's ready to whip out a try me at a moment's notice, even if the tone doesn't call for it at all.]

Yes, you may.

[711]

[AHEMS LOUDLY IN THE DISTANCE]

You didn't seem to entirely hate what I was doing to you. Why is that?

[canceller]

[They didn't talk about it in this capacity last time. Obviously there was the layer of aphrodisiac deeply swaying his desire to resist, but even Suzaku could tell beyond that.

Careful what you wish for, Orange boy.]

I enjoy pain sometimes. Physical force as well.

[711]

[Bruh, same hat??? It's a good few minutes before Suzaku's reply comes, but let it be known that he sat there, phone in hand, and struggled to come up with one.]

I understand. I'm the same way.

[😳]

[canceller]

[... It's not the response he expected.]

I see.

[Why does this feel like dangerous information to have?]

It's not terribly uncommon, so I suppose that's not surprising.

[711]

I wouldn't call your reaction "terribly uncommon."

[Called the fuck out. One masochist recognizes another.]

What I did to you wasn't appropriate, but if there are portions of it that you enjoyed, I wouldn't mind trying those things with you again.

If you'd like to.

[Translation: ey jerry u want sum fuk]

For the time being, I'm curious to know what all we have in common. It's an easier conversation to have over text than it is to have face to face, I think.

[canceller]

... No, perhaps not to that degree.

[But he had enjoyed those parts, even in ways beyond simple pain and physicality that make his stomach twist up, thinking maybe he shouldn't but knows he still does. They've clung to the corners of his mind, acknowledged at times but not yet accepted. When it's asked for, invited in, doesn't that change everything?]

I would be open to discussing that.

[And here's where he has to re-do his message several times over. Jeremiah's not sure where the root cause of this discomfort sits, still.]

However, would it not be more comfortable to explore this with a partner closer in age?

[711]

Does my age concern you that much?

[canceller]

[Jeremiah stares at what he ultimately landed on, and cringes a little.]

Less than I may have implied. I've just never been the older party in these situations prior to my time here. It's unfamiliar.

[711]

[Expose your neck and Suzaku will go for the jugular. Whatever doubts Suzaku can ease will be eased. The others will be dealt with in time.]

Most of my experience comes from people around your age. If it helps, this won't be unfamiliar territory for me.

[As if that would help.]

[canceller]

[Actually...] Well, it's relevant.

If I may ask, is it a matter of preference, or just happenstance?

[711]

I suppose it's both.

When I was in the Britannian military, I would get a lot of attention from much older women... but even as a child, the girls I liked were always much older than myself.

[Like the maid he'd developed a crush on at the ripe old age of three. Some people grow up more quickly than others, though one could just as easily argue that the odd cog in the machine is Suzaku.]

[canceller]

It sounds familiar.

[He has to laugh at himself.]

And with men? Is it any different?

[711]

I'd never been with another man before coming here. Well... not on the receiving end. I feel like I should mind it more than I do.

On second thought, this is all pretty embarrassing to type out.

[Could they, perhaps, meet up somewhere...?]

[canceller]

That's understandable. We can change the subject, if you like.

[Of course he instead offers an out like any Britannian ex-noble would.]

[711]

[Leave it to a Britannian to look for an easy way out.]

I'd rather talk about this in person.

[canceller]

I'm open to that as well.

[It was for his benefit, really. Not that Suzaku ever would take it.]

Where would you like to meet?

[711]

Let's take a bath.

[Together, as men of culture do.]

I've been meaning to try out the hot springs anyway.

[canceller]

[Wanting restraint, yet proposing they get naked together. It would seem suspicious if he didn't remember moments later that public bathing isn't regarded the same everywhere in the world.]

That sounds pleasant.

[Then, a follow-up when he considers it.]

Shall we meet at the resort, or would you like to walk there together?

[711]

I wouldn't mind getting a walk in. When would you like me to come by and pick you up?

[The honor is all his, m'jerry.]

[canceller]

Is it not out of your way? Or are you just being chivalrous?

[He'd like to think he's a champion in that practice. A knight, a damn good one where it counted, could give him a run for his money though. It doesn't sound bad, actually.]

Any time is fine, really.

[Please, like Jeremiah has much taking up his time here.]

[711]

I'll leave that up to you to decide. I'll be there shortly.

[And arrive shortly he does. Knock knock, it's the dick pic boy.]